Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Just a quick update on Ellina, She is doing very well. She started nursing 1-2 times a day and is doing very well with it, surprised us all.. She latched well and after the first few times she stayed latched. She has also always gotten plenty enough from nursing that we haven't had to feed her any more after she nurses. So that is just amazing and it makes me extremely proud of her. I also had the doctor come and tell me that that Ellina needs her shots, that's something that scares me to death that I'm gonna make the wrong choice. She is still so little and has no immunities so I don't see that she could fight off anything right now including a fever from a shot. But she also is able to get the deceases way easier too. I don't want to be stuck on an idea either way (shots or no shots) I just want to do whats right by my baby. Another thing we need prayer for is Ellinas eyes, her last 2 eye exams have showed some problems with the growth due from prematurity and oxygen therapy. She is in stage 1 in the left eye and stage 2 in her right. 2 weeks ago is h=when the problem showed up and yesterday they checked and its the same. They say the laser surgery isn't that big a deal but its still all so scary. Now to note my feelings at this point. I always have my good and bad days, it seems that Ive been having more bad lately. I wish I could just have a good cry but I'm not able to, I think I'm still out of tears. There are 3 sets of twins in the nicu right now and that's really not helping me with the bad days, I came to the conclusion that, who and I to judge who deserves what? And none of us deserve our kids just some of us are privileged while others have to experience something else. I never wanted to know what loosing my children felt like but now I hope that I can help someone else by that understanding. Ok so Im very thankful for the children I do have, I think that the blessing is I still have someone to love and to feel for otherwise I think this pain would have taken my feeling all away. Im good though and I know Im gonna make it through


  1. I will be praying for little Ellina. My son had a surgery at ten mo. of age to fix a UT defect, and he spent four hours in surgery. It was a rough day, but within four days he was back to his old happy self. Ellina seems so tough!..I can totally see her bouncing right back and not letting it faze her one bit. I couldn't get either of my 36 weekers to nurse and little Ellina is going along at under 5 lbs...im so happy for you. Keep thinking happy thoughts..you and your family are in my daily prayers.

  2. I know how you feel about twins. I often wonder why other people got healthy kids and I got one healthy and one not. God prepares us for everything somehow, so I have been ready for most of the challenges. this feeding tube thing is scary, but she needed it. Abi is normal. its so weird. Sebastian was born with a lot of the same problems as Zoe, and he outgrew them. I hope the same for Zoe and Ellina. about immunizations, I am personally against immunizing babies. I say wait a long time, and skip some all together. I waited until ethan was 10 & seb was 4.5. that said, my husband is very pro-immunizing, so I trusted that God would Bless my obedience and protect my girls and we gave some shots, at 6 months (none sooner) and I made them split them up, refused more than 1 per month and skipped anything that our family has had problems with, which were DPT, MMR, and polio for my kids and Vincent. anything measles gave corinne a bad reaction. Now all the kids are up to date except for MMR, HIB, polio and hep B. so far they seem fine, praise be to God! its a decision only you can make, but maybe it will help you by hearing what I've done with my own little NICU alum!
    good luck, God bless, love you!